Saturday, May 22, 2010

Thursday, May 20, 2010

Wildwood, New Jersey flashback

Was this the pilot for Jersey Shore? It's like all the episodes condensed into 6 minutes


Text: Roxanne Knouse
Photos: Heavy Percussion

the only reason we got invited to this shitty surface magazine party was my devastatingly good impression of the addicted to love models. i only know this because every time Ive imitated them, my life has changed.

the first time i wore red lipstick and played air guitar without smiling was in third grade. at that point i was worth 7 millie and didn't give a fuck. i broke up with a kid named Freddy because after dating me for two hours he whistled at me in the lunch line. shortly thereafter, i walked into the third stall of that four stall bathroom and dragged the red lipstick on my 8 year old lips until i was sure i would never be publicly humiliated by a fat kid named Freddy again.

i digress.

i scooped fellow shootie operative and jumped into a train hole. if there are no signs you will never know every train you wait for is the WRONG train. go back down and up again. WRONG. up down up, open close up again. WRONG.

fuck it. we were either getting on this train and getting to tribeca or going to Jilleen's. by order of the Jilleen

besides making fun of children for selling candy for video games, we barged the spanish lounge populated by every resident of who cares. at least four people decided to volunteer information about how they "do everything and are just creative period." if it weren't for shaun shaundershaun*, we would have been reduced to a pile of camel light ash topped with a note that says "no one asked you what you do, and we hate rockabilly music,"

eskimo kisses for the clown with no face.

mashed potato, twist, jumps, awkward humping from a swiss gentleman.

it makes me feel like a bad person when i get to boss grown men at least 10 years older than me around. he definitely had more money but a ton less clue. i convinced vsdjbfaskdfb** to do a friendly shirt exchange in the tribeca grand.

i felt our task at hand was completed when a circle formed behind vsdkhsdihk and i while they whispered "do you know her?" and i yelled "you wish."suits make you feel like an assassin and anyone i date from now on will have to begin our fuck filibusters in a suit, he may have to wear a gun too.

the clock struck midnight, and just like cinderella, i had to take off a suit jacket from a man whose name was unknown to me and put my own clothes back on.

jilleen loaned her board to elisa steamer when she was 6 years old and then took it back.
we got in the cash cab, then got out because we didnt have any of that.

an evening of many doing it then stopping it, dont do that anymores. she rode off into the night with my heart and strawberry jeans. she wore a red bandana, played a blue piana, in a hon-ky tonk down in mex-i-co. fuck a magazine party.

*name has ben chaged kin-da
**not changed-swissy-face

Wednesday, May 19, 2010


Tuesday, May 18, 2010


Recycled skateboard rings. Pretty cute wood rings! From Etsy seller Sevenply

From the same seller! baby chairs

Time to get a skateboard rack. Found a guy that makes them in Santa Cruz. Feeling the display board assortments. Too bad everyone in Santa Cruz is batshit crazy.. ha!

Monday, May 17, 2010

I wonder if the Gulf of Mexico being salt water would make a difference. Otherwise, BP should get on this hay situation. Send in the hay!!!!!